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Me and The Monkey: Chronicles of the Monkey God Vol 1


eBook: $2.99

Hardcover: $19.98

Book Type: Print & Digital


Well, there’s this talking monkey who won me in a game of Othello in a coffee shop in Amsterdam. He came back to Cornwall with me and has become a prolific reader and dabbler in magic. He also has past life flashbacks – the most prominent of which are the Nam special forces ones. We have partially deceased girlfriends who apparently eat dead bodies. The Monkey created a sort of black hole in the spare bedroom, and now we have a team of nerds investigating it and trying to stop ‘things’ coming out of it. A bunch of Oriental hit men who appear to believe he is a god attempted to steal The Monkey’s magic lolly pop sticks, but he managed to blow them up in their caravan. We are off to Cambodia in search of a temple from which came a monkey faced pendant with glowing eyes, and we seem to have upset an international cabal who are out to get us. Oh, and did I mention that The Monkey likes a cigar, and we regularly get very drunk on Jack Daniels… Interested? Perplexed? Worried? Come on in and join the fun. Written in the form of blog entries, this is our story so far...


4 July Got drunk with the Russians last night. What was going to be just a visit to collect the diving equipment turned into a full-blown drinking session on board the Russian cargo ship. Must have been prophetic that we were drinking vodka the other night because we sure as hell drank a lot of it until the early hours of the morning! Even had a worried call from the Nerds asking if we were all right – bless ‘em. Am aching like a bastard today as The Monkey once more got me into a fight, although this one was friendlier and called wrestling apparently – despite the fact that my opponent was the size of a Transit van. The Monkey said it was bound to happen so he just pre-empted it. Well thanks for that! Anyway, we are now all great friends and my head feels like Thor has been smashing it with his hammer. Had to sleep it off in some borrowed hammocks and have just got home. The Nerds look a bit jealous even though I have a black eye and swollen lip and The Monkey has scorched fur on his shoulder from trying to breath fire with vodka and cigars. We will not be going through the black hole today. I need to sit still until the Norse god has finished his drum solo…

Book Details

Book Type: Print & Digital

ISBN-13: 9781916084599

ISBN-10: 1916084591

Edition: 1

Publisher: Bad Press Ink


Language: English

Pages: 240

Interior: Color

Keywords: , , , ,


About The Author

I write the things that pop up in my head – bizarre, humorous fantasy with a large dose of psychedelics, booze, guns, alternative history, conspiracy, magic and general lunacy – because, well, let's face it, no one else is going to! When not writing, I am a motion graphics artist for the live events industry. I live on the North coast of Cornwall with my wife, teenage daughter, cat and two ponies.

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